I'm not much of a joiner. Since I got kicked out of fifth grade chorus for singing too loud, I've been weary of being a member of a group. In fact, there are many reasons why I don't want to belong to them. Too many meetings. Too many rules. I don't like to leave the house at night. Every night is my TV night. Last fall, at Wrentham Day, I was exposed to a group that I have belonged to and didn't even know it. In the crowd, a man was wearing a D.A.D.D. T-shirt, otherwise known as Dads Against Daughters Dating. They sell very cool T-shirts. While I believe in the cause, I don't necessarily …

Dear Santa, How have you been? I hope this letter finds both you and Mrs. Claus in good health. I've been meaning to write you my list for this year, but I've been kinda of busy with this Patch thing. Anyway, for the last 20 years or so, I've asked for a big-screen TV, and I'm still waiting. I know I haven't always been good. Just the other day, a nice police officer pulled me over because I forgot to put my registration sticker on my license plate. It was due in July. Procrastination is a problem. I'm not exactly neat around the house. I have this bad habit of making a mess in the kitchen …

  Helmet? Check. Shoulder pads? Check. Rib pads? Check. Athletic supporter? Check. No, I'm not playing football in the high school Super Bowls or as quarterback for the Colts against the Patriots. Yes, I'm getting ready for Christmas shopping. This column isn't really for those who are adept at shopping and navigating the perils of the mall. I'm extremely jealous of those people. I wish they would take me with them to do my holiday shopping. I'd even pay a fee. I went to a certain store the other day with a holiday wreath in its logo, and they have a bargain theme to their commercials. My …

  Cough, cough, sniff, sniff. I'm writing this column in pain from the cold, flu, infection or whatever I've had for the last month. It's the bug that came for Halloween and stayed for Thanksgiving. Yes, I've been to a doctor. "Take this medicine and you will feel better by next Tuesday," he said. It's Friday and I'm still in major coughing mode. I know I'm not alone. I hear you coughing in the coffee shop or see you dealing with a runny nose. Wait. I just had another major coughing fit. I've been to my local pharmacy where it is stocked with rows and rows of stuff to help me, us, feel better…